Death and life have taught me that child-loss is unthinkable, and they have taught me that anguish is inescapable. Additionally, death and life have taught me that grief has no expiration date. As a result, the separation I have yet to bounce back from is the ultimate untimely farewell (Ade’s death), which was the last separation Ade and I would have.
Who would have thought that writing about the times I was aversely separated from my oldest son—and about the inescapable nonstop grief I have felt since I lost him—would turn into a labor of love? I never thought the day would come when this therapeutic exercise would become my approved for production memoir.
These holidays have me thinking about all my loved ones who are no longer living on this Earth. I’m deeply missing all of them. However, it is my son—Olumuyiwa Ade Keen—that I miss most of all!
We never should take any life for granted—never should assume our loved ones will live long, healthy, and prosperous lives. We should hank God, every day, for His precious gifts called children, grandchildren, and great-grandchildren, and spend as much time as possible with all of them.
For the people who think that parents of a deceased son or daughter should get over their loss (should stop grieving) after a few months, I want you to know that their ‘missing a child’ feeling never goes away. This truth means their grief has no expiration date. Furthermore, because a piece of these grieving parents is gone (lost forever), these parents will never be the same again.