First Anniversary of Ade’s Death

02 Wednesday May 2018

Posted by Rev. Nadine Drayton-Keen in Heartbreak, Tribute

Tags

1-Year Anniversary, Ade, critique, death, diabetes, Heaven, l, memoir, mother-son bond, mother-son relationship, mother-son separations, new book, oldest son, Olumuyiwa, pain-free, resting in the Lord, ultimate separation, untimely farewells

Olumuyiwa Ade Keen

April 30, 1972 – May 2, 2017

He always comes alongside us to comfort us in every suffering so that we can come alongside those who are in any painful trial. We can bring them this same comfort that [YeHoVaH] has poured out upon us. And just as we experience the abundance of [Yeshua HaMashiach’s] own sufferings, even more of [YeHoVaH’s] comfort will cascade upon us through our union with [Yeshua HaMashiach].

If troubles weigh us down, that just means that we will receive even more comfort to pass on to you for your deliverance! For the comfort pouring into us empowers us to bring comfort to you. And with this comfort upholding you, you can endure victoriously the same suffering that we experience. ~ 2 Corinthians 1:4-6, TPT

I have been up all night—not because I was worried about how I will handle today. I have been up all night, because I was making some very minor revisions to my memoir. Praise Good!

It’s amazing how God had me working on my memoir, starting last night and ending early this morning. It is no coincidence that my manuscript focuses on the many times Ade and I have been separated—all our untimely farewells, including the ultimate separation.

Where Ade is concerned, his ultimate separation happened on May 2, 2017. It didn’t take this first anniversary long to get here. It really seems like Ade went home to be with the Lord just yesterday.

I couldn’t visit Ade’s earthly resting place in person, but I am definite there in Spirit. I know he knows how much I love him and miss him. Those are messages I can send from wherever I may be in this world on any given May 2^nd. Still, in my absence, I would love it if his grave is adorned with beautiful flowers that are from the family.

In addition to the flowers and the narrative that I have dedicated to Ade, I plan to look at many pictures of my son today. I am sure there will be some photos that will make me cry, but so far today I’ve only been smiling.

For this one-year anniversary of Ade’s death, I am re-posting the poem I wrote for his homegoing service’s program. As I say in my memoir, this poem captures my understanding of the God-kind of Hope He gives to parents who have lost a child. My poem is as follows:

Just Sleeping: Only Believe

Nothing in life happens by chance
Neither by accident nor happenstance;
The Fates can’t override providence
Or replace it with inevitable dominance.

Destiny may be written on some stars
But only Creator knows how long ours
Has until we are snuffed like a candle—
On the fade to black shut-eye channel.

Death brags with no reason to be proud
For he claims no life God hasn’t allowed;
Sorrows touch humans for many reasons
But He who changes times and seasons
Raises the sleeping; changes bad to good,
And upgrades His aggrieved to sainthood.

The saints who still move and still breathe
Must exercise the faith needed to believe
They’ll see their gone-home family again
Healed from all misery, illness, and pain.

Ade was 24 years old when he was diagnosed with Diabetes. From that day forward, most of his adult life was full of excruciating pain, yet he never complained. I truly am thankful to God that Ade is no longer in pain, but because on Earth grief has no expiration date my pain won’t ever end.

On this May 2, 2018, I am sending up this message on the Wings of The Dove:

I miss you, Ade. I love you, Ade. I think about you, Ade. I won’t ever forget you, Ade.

Love,

Your MOM . . . . .

P.S.

Here is a critique of my soon to be published new book, Lord willing. This book is my memoir that I plan to give the title of Untimely Farewells. The critique is as follows:

“This is a beautiful and moving story that depicts the ups and downs of a wonderful family, and the relational interactions between each member; especially between the mother and her 1^st born son. It is obvious that the mother-son relationship is of utmost importance and you do an exceptional job of painting a verbal portrait of this.

The writing is done well and the story also flows well. There is a cohesiveness and a natural flow to the content.” ~ Desireé Harris-Bonner, MBA

Managing Partner

#Spiritual Midwife for Emerging Authors

DHBonner Virtual Solutions, LLC

Raining Nonstop in My Heart

13 Sunday Aug 2017

Posted by Rev. Nadine Drayton-Keen in Tribute

≈ 2 Comments

Tags

Ade (my crown), agony, anger, angry, breavement, child-loss, collateral beauty, death, diabetes, domino effect, dominoes, eternal Love, eternal soul, grief, grieving, hopelessness, Indian Giver, kills, long life, loss, missing a child, Olumuyiwa (God Provides this), pain, raining, sadness, suffering, surreal, unfair, Wet Monsoon

Honor your father and your mother, that your days may be prolonged in the land which the Lord your God gives you. ~ Exodus 20:12, NASB

As for the days of our life, they contain seventy years,
Or if due to strength, eighty years,
Yet their pride is but labor and sorrow;
For soon it is gone and we fly away. ~ Psalm 90:10, NASB

When Jesus saw the crowds, He went up on the mountain; and after He sat down, His disciples came to Him. He opened His mouth and began to teach them, saying,

“Blessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.” ~ Matthew 5:1-3, NASB

and He will wipe away every tear from their eyes; and there will no longer be any death; there will no longer be any mourning, or crying, or pain; the first things have passed away. ~ Revelation 21:4, NASB

Human life comes with no magical number—
Threescore years and ten not guaranteed to
Everyone into whom the Breath of Life is breathed
Putting within all living souls an eternal soul
An endless spiritual dimension of humanity.

Yet long-life promise Command is figurative—
At best, most days are long in Promised Lands
But years are far shorter than the psalmist’s seventy
Briefer still for countless parents’ beloved sons
Or daughters they received from Indian Giver:
Grief’s irate criticism of living souls’ Creator.

Heartache cosigns divers pejorative expressions—
Death makes them intensely strange bedfellows;
Thankfully, God’s Love covers a multitude of mindsets
Dead set on using finger pointing to hide the pain
That mentally fighting noxious emotional wounds
Deepen as human nature ignores Spirit’s Healing.

Child-loss pain is without equal, unlike none other—
Uniquely categorized since it betters bereavements’
Other types, triggering rawest ever-conceived anger that
Wages war against the unfairness of it all, hardening
Hearts reluctant to see collateral beauty around them
Uninterrupted by undying love that sets off joy and hope.

Domino effect doesn’t just signify a future disaster—
It illustrates how love that is in the middle of all life
Is hearts’ forever falling domino concurrently connecting
By coupling each toppled one to grief, pain, suffering,
Loss, or varied other ripples, including death, as they
Form rings around unending love’s collateral beauty.

Even so, diabetes monkey wrenched my life—
This pre-existing condition snuffed out
Olumuyiwa’s candle short of my often prayed for
Long-life plan for my eldest son whose
Given name means: ‘God provides this.’

I’m sure Ade, denoting ‘my crown,’ will get his—
For my strong soldier fought the hardest battles;
Still my heart misses its vital piece needed to fix these
Throbbing, flip-flopping, pounding, skipping beat
Irregular rhythms’ agonizingly irksome hiccups.

They’re from regularly reran videos of his life—
He’s infant, teen, adult; optimist then pessimist;
He’s laughing, speaking, leaving, returning, then dying
In my head’s wirelessly streamed detailed scenes
Of jubilation and desolation that wear me down.

Every interlude between reruns baits my fear—
Cruel taunts make me believe I have begun to
Forget the strong-willed, handsome, animated part
Of me that died, living now only in memories
Daydreams summon instantly without delay.

Losing Olumuyiwa unlocked soulish floodgates—
Now it’s heavily raining nonstop in my old heart,
Wet monsoons from an overflowing waterlogged soul;
Life is surreal like I’m imprisoned and dying in
The center of a floating no locks, no bars vast
Airless gravity-defying water designed bubble.

Losing Olumuyiwa aftereffect is canyon in heart—
This too wide to close gap prevents me from ever
Being same person, since grief has no expiration date
Just a myriad of sadness and hopelessness tides
That confirm uncomfortable truth: he’s not here.

~ The above poem is from my new poetry manuscript titled Deep-Rooted Disposition.

~ The above video (MP4 file) is stored on Google Drive. I created and posted this video on July 2, 2017. It is a tribute to my son, Olumuyiwa Ade Keen, who died on May 2, 2017. “Softly at Sunrise” by Gerald Alright is the song that is playing in the background. Olumuyiwa loved this Smooth Jazz song!